Saturday, May 10, 2008


I am married to a chronic, pathological liar. I knew this way back when, I just didn't know why and, frankly, I thought that the lies were job-related. As it turns out, every word, literally every word, she utters is a lie.

What constitutes a lie, then? My definition is probably a lot like yours. A lie is an untruth, spoken or written, overt or indirect. The lie of omission is certainly the worst kind because it puts the onus of having to make a decision about the nature of the untruth on the person in receipt of the lie. Combine overt lying with misdirection and omission and what you have is a six-headed-dragon's worth of nonsense meant to hinder and hurt. The only solution is to have nothing to do with a person like this. They can never be contrite, nor will they admit their lie. That would give up control to the lie-ee (I know that's not a word, but work with me, here) to decide whether to continue to bother with that person.

I am in such a situation. I am being lied to using misdirection, misrepresentation and omission. A secret is one thing - everyone is entitled to same - but the lie represented by "I want this" where every effort on the part of the offending party says the opposite is, well, insulting. I guess it works for stupid people. But the offender knows full well that I'm not only sensitive to such manipulation but is also aware that I will take the time to carefully analyse all of my input.

In honour of myself, I will leave it be. It was all unnecessary and in the end, purposely hurtful, meant to punish. I told the truth when asked and even when I thought it was important, always, dammit. The result was vindictive lying. This, I cannot forgive or forget because it was meant to mislead, so that I would be toyed with. Trust from me is very hard to come by. Read back a few entries and understand that my own blood kin lied to me, for pretty much my entire life and if I can't forgive those sins, I certainly won't be forgiving yours.

This is war. I am talking no prisoners. I will not retreat. I will not surrender, not now, not ever. No, I won't turn the other cheek - I'm not Jesus. And if he gets in my way, I'm a gonna stomp Him, too. Your actions are your responsibility so don't blame me for what you willfully and purposely destroyed. I hope your pain lasts and lasts and lasts.

Have a nice day. Byotch.